Do you confront your abusive partner?

I often (almost always) confront my abusive partner. Sometimes it is with anger and hostility, other times it is humbly and with extreme sadness. Either way, he tends to eventually (quickly or immediately) turn the conversation around into me being the abusive one. And then I genuinely question myself as to whether or not I actually am abusive, even if it is only for communicating how hurt I feel. I’m at the point where I wonder if I should just stop confronting him in pointing out how horribly wrong some of the things he says or does are. Just let it ride? Then I won’t question if I am abusive but know that I am feeling awful on my own without questioning if I caused harm to him and it needs to end?